As a parent’s driving skills deteriorate over time, they might not recognize they have a problem.
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My parent is starting to experience memory issues but wishes to continue to drive. When is it time for someone to stop driving?
Performance should be the determining factor of when to stop driving. With that being said, as your parent’s driving skills deteriorate over time, they might not recognize they have a problem. For this reason, it is essential to work closely with your parent’s doctor to monitor their driving and help them stop when it is no longer safe for them. Here are some tips that can help.
Watch for Warning Signs The best way to keep tabs on your parent’s driving abilities is to take frequent rides with them and watch out for warning signs. Warning signs of unsafe driving include the following:
Do they have trouble remembering routes to familiar places?
Do they drive at inappropriate speeds, tailgate, drift between lanes or fail to observe traffic signs?
Do they react slowly or make poor driving decisions?
Have they had any recent fender benders or tickets?
Have you noticed any dents or scrapes on their vehicle?
If you need assistance with assessing your parent’s abilities, consider hiring a driver rehabilitation specialist. These licensed professionals are qualified and trained to evaluate a driver’s physical, perceptual and cognitive abilities to see if they can drive safely. You can find a specialist in your area by visiting myaota.aota.org/driver_search or aded.net.
Transition Tips If you believe it is still safe for your parent to drive, recommend some simple adjustments to ensure their safety. These can include driving only during daylight hours and sticking to familiar routes, as well as avoiding busy roads and bad weather. You may also encourage your parent to sign a “driving contract” that designates someone to inform them when it is no longer safe to drive. Go to alz.org/driving and click on “Download.” Once the PDF file is downloaded to your computer, you can print it out to have your parent sign it.
You may also want to consider getting a GPS tracking device to help monitor your parent’s driving. These allow you to track their location and let you set up zones and speed limits. You will receive alerts to your smartphone if they exit a designated area, drive too fast or brake harshly.
Time to Quit When your parent can no longer drive safely, it will be important to have a conversation with them. It is best to start these conversations before they need to quit driving so they can prepare themselves. You should also have a plan for alternative transportation (including a list of family, friends and local options) that will help them get around once they stop driving.
Refusing to Quit If your parent refuses to stop driving, you have several options. First, suggest a visit to their doctor for a medical evaluation to prescribe that they stop driving. Older people will sometimes listen to their doctor more readily than to family members.
You should also consider contacting your local Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) branch for help. Some states automatically revoke a license when a person is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or dementia, while many others require retaking a driving test.
If these attempts fail, consider selling your parent’s car or moving it to another location where they will not have access to the vehicle. It is also important to ensure your parent cannot access any other vehicles, so be mindful of where car keys are left when family members, friends or medical staff visit your parent.
“Savvy Living” is written by Jim Miller, a regular contributor to NBC’s “Today Show.” The column, and others like it, is available to read via The American Legion’s Fund Development program, a way of establishing your legacy of support for the organization while providing for your current financial needs. Consider naming The American Legion in your will or trust as a part of your personal legacy. Learn more about the process, and the variety of charitable programs you can benefit, at legion.org/plannedgiving. Clicking on “Learn more” will bring up an “E-newsletter” button, where you can sign up for regular information.
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